11-13-03 - 3:03 p.m.
I had lunch with Friday yesterday as well as three days ago. I stopped asking him, and promised myself I'd wait for him. Three weeks later, he spent one week acting like he was about to ask, and finally he did on Monday. Friday also has a sharp wit, he questions my broad statements, and is another academia nut. He played the part of Felix Unger in a scene from The Odd Couple. The looks on his face alone made the scene brilliant. His eyes nearly popped out of his head in one scene. In another, where Oscar blew smoke in his face, he looked like he had tasted bad fish. Friday's evolved into a fabulous actor from the initial "shy guy" I perceived. I almost have a bit of a crush on him. Funny, I intuitively feel that he may return the tiny crush, but don't plan on advancing on this. #1) The more I like a guy, the less likely I am to pursue them. #2) I realize I haven't exposed much of my "personal self" to him, or vice-versa. #3) I have no faith in any one as far as real relationships go, now.
I spent some time with Zoe last night and found out that she is even flakier then I thought. (Surprise! I never expect the flakiness that eventually shows its face.) She brought a friend along to our proposed "hang out" with which she shared private jokes. We went to dinner, but she addressed me very little. Apparently she is not interested when sober. I was hoping for girl talk, at the very least. Instead I got to watch the kissing cousins gossip about people who are strangers to me and buzz about shoes. Then she ran into an old friend and the majority of the time was devoted to the topics of Weed, Codeine, Alcohol, and Zanex. The rest of the week, I am fairly busy. I see Nash today, I see Steve on Friday, I see Noah on Saturday. Bat called me and was sorry because Tuesday night was "weird." Right. He seemed vaguely jealous and tried to get me to promise I would not fool around. He said they were probably dates even though the guys used the term "hang out." I humored him somewhat. I said "Nothing physical with Nash, nothing physical with Steven, nothing sexual with Noah." "Oh, so Noah's different." "Yeah, he's kinda upper crust." Let him be jealous, trying to control my sex life after having no claims on me.
Some minor pseudonym changes and character additions. Noah is Thai, a Tech graduate, and a member of the informal toga club from Lawrence's October 25 party -- one of those ones I spoke to for five hours. Steve is also a member of said "club", but I have some political rapport with him. I know Zoe from toga club, too -- but if meeting with her was a good preview of what is to come, I am doomed with the others. Nash is the guy I knew in middle school and hung out with last Monday. Of all these people, he is the one *know* I like.
All this hanging out somehow fulfills a social fantasy I had. I know I'm not "popular" perse, but I damn well feel like it. I'm a social butterfly.
